The Way you choose to look at it…

It has been a minute. Hope your week is going well. I have been trying to keep up, positively.

Someone dismissed me yesterday (or so I thought). This caused me a mild frustration. I had all kinds of thoughts to confront them and feelings that they do not take me serious. It was especially unsettling to learn that they approached someone else over a matter I personally raised to them. I took my time going over “the dismissal” after learning this.

I had choices to make. I could follow up with them in pretense that I am not aware that they responded or, leave them be and take it as an isolated circumstance. Another way to handle this was to choose to focus on what the third party shared as their response to what it is a common matter to the three of us. After all, what I needed clarity on was attended to, just not with me.

The first option felt pity, and I have grown to respect myself so much more. I respect the person, and do not have “issues” with them. This means, I do not quite have reasons to let this change our relationship. I then expressed my discomfort in the way the matter was attended to the third party instead, as a way to let it out my system. I trust the third party, as I am closer to them. As the day went by, I eased back into the feedback received. This chapter on Probability Concepts (Statistics) randomly landed me to this relief. I was just reaching and definitely not willing to be positive. Probably just not objective earlier on, I understood. A moment of weakness perhaps, on my part. My history with rejection and handling my insecurities could have influenced my first reaction. I was being negative about myself. I did not confront them and choose to address my feelings elsewhere.

I think I eventually became objective. I took it for what it was and not what I was making it to be. I was making it about me, when in fact it was about the matter that needed clarity. What a beautiful experience this was, now that it is over. It literally tested my positive thinking.

The way you think about yourself has an influence on how you perceive others and their response to your energy. In relation to my story, I feel like in a moment of weakness, where I thought less about myself, ended up making me assume others think nothing of me. In the first place, I should not concern myself with other people’s thoughts of me. It sure is not what helps in having a positive outlook of life. This is simply because I cannot control their feelings or them entirely. I CAN ONLY CONTROL MYSELF. I feel like this was the lesson. Even if I was dismissed, the fact that I was brave in confronting my low-self esteemed moment (by sharing how I felt peacefully away from that person) suggests to me that I am on my way to better handling matters. I am just saying here, I am seeing the light and in it for the shine. When I initiate things or and raise them, should they not go as expect/prefer; I hope to remember this experience. I have been through this before. I did not focus on being calm as well as I did, yesterday. I am growing!

I have just this one thing to do left, thank that person for the feedback received. Here is to handling things better! It Matters, You Matter!

Regards

Livhuwani