Giving in – to your truth!

The anew has been revitalizing. Living not afraid of your truth is liberating. It is also elevating. Something most of us need!

This month I have been focusing on what is true, to me. It meant I would forsake shying away from things and people I do not quite feel ready for. From actually checking up on my debts and facing them, to giving my family a chance to be as they are, even when I do not quite understand or agree with what is. I always read and ponder on this post by Toby Mac that most of us are fighting the elements and kindness can go a long way. Isn’t that the truth?

The greatest war is not one with others, but that with ONESELF. The truth is, most of the time we find ourselves having so much invested in fighting others, when in fact we are literally struggling with the main opponent, our own-selves. This battlefield is easy to neglect as there are many distractions to occupy our mind, body and spirit. What is true to most of us is that we have a lot to be concerned about within, besides outside matters. And so, the key to being Vibrant had to hit me where it Matters most, and that is inwardly.

“Hard times arouse an instinctive desire for authenticity.” – Coco Chanel

I did find being truthful scary but rather just hard as it made me feel more naked than usual. So when a hard matter came to, I needed to be more intentional about admitting it is hard so that I can then face it truthfully. The sugarcoat became bitter and needed some riddance. Eventually somewhere along the month, my mind was setting me up to settling debts(everyone can agree how easier it is to procrastinate), to choosing to rest over showing up, to having a conversation with my kids about “Mom” and her feelings and them sharing their feelings, to forgiving what I did not really get over even though I kept claiming I did. I did have as many conversations with myself about how I let myself down many times, like when I failed to say no to being used perhaps at work and then get home to complain instead. I did tell my doctor I’m tired thankfully, and I could use some rest. I gave time to “the family I choose” with an open mind and I thoroughly enjoyed being with them. I did look at my parents with graceful eyes, to say as imperfect as they are, they surely are irreplaceable. I gave into laughing more at jokes without fearing the coming off as insensitive. I prayed about my grudges, my desires, my business, my sensitivity, my skin imperfections, the country’s state, my loved ones, my confidence, my bad side and many more… What I found about being in my truth is that, I did not have to put up a front. I did not have to attend an all night prayer thinking I am holy but with every intention to have my flaws dealt with. I had this awareness about most things, that no matter how cool I may appear, it won’t be enough to warm up what keeps me cold inwardly.

As this quote hit home: “Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.”

Aldous Huxley, Complete Essays, Vol. II: 1926-1929

Ignorance is a thief of authenticity. Say you know you are not feeling the company you are in, and you try and ignore that misplaced energy. Can you tell me how many times you found yourself telling someone about it honestly? Stuff like, there was no vibe, I just stayed cause I had to. Can you also recall how reluctant you became about the next meeting with the same people? The run around you gave them to arriving late and not in the mood… Not giving into your truth feels like that. It certainly cannot take away the effects no matter how good at pretending you become. Choosing to focus on reflecting, reconciling and restoration this month for me, gave me a chance to face my truth. I can already see some outcomes in the way I have been approaching matters of faith. There is a shift in the way I am receiving His revelations when I read my Bible. I am finding that I take time to relate first before I go around sharing with others (You). Being true to myself is giving a sense of clarity, a more appreciative note on how different we all are and just how important it is to be less concerned about perfect performance but rather being present.

“That inner voice has both gentleness and clarity. So to get to authenticity, you really keep going down to the bone, to the honesty, and the inevitability of something.” – Meredith Monk

It is in this post that I render my honest truth and say, being true to yourself is not for the weak. Facing yourself is much like getting a taste of your own bitter medicine but with surety that it will serve you well for the better. It really needs an intense intent to value being self-aware and how much more healthier your engagements can become. There is a way worth travelling in the line of Self-Care. What I love most about this path is that, it drops off what and who no longer needs to be part of Your journey, and at the same time giving room to what and who is for you.

“Be your authentic self. Your authentic self is who you are when you have no fear of judgment, or before the world starts pushing you around and telling you who you’re supposed to be. Your fictional self is who you are when you have a social mask on to please everyone else. Give yourself permission to be your authentic self.” – Dr. Phil

I hope you will have it in you to give in to your truth. It Matters, You Matter!

Regards

Livhuwani